Don't talk about the baldies!
Fatboy SSE is having an up-and-down week in Miami. He’s been hanging out at strip clubs and racking up connections for his goofy skits, but he’s still not going to get a Tory Lanez feature any time soon In spite of how many times he’s tried.
Things went south again in the latest skit from Fatboy. The Instagram comedian tried to get another feature from Tory Lanez who turned him down, as usual. Then Fatboy took things a step too far: he started clowning on Tory’s receding hairline. Of course, Lanez had to stand up for his gradually balding brothers.
“We not doing this, bro,” Lanez warns after Fatboy accosts him looking for a hook. “I’ve realized. You just be talking the talk.”
As Lanez tries to walk away, Fatboy shouts “That’s why you lost your hairline!” at the part of his head that still has some follicles. Lanez wheels around, shocked that he would bring hairlines into this. (Hairlines are a solid 8 on the Don’t Bring It Up scale, which counts from one to mamas.)
“I do this for n*ggas everywhere worldwide losing their hairlines!” he shouts, in his best approximation of “First of all, you ain’t rapped long enough.”
“N*ggas receding worldwide, n*gga!” he continues, advancing on Fatboy. “Don’t talk about the baldy. Don’t talk about the receding, my n*gga.”
Fatboy seems to have learned his lesson by the end of the clip, but the post’s caption is a classic example of Fatboy’s mind control over Tory Lanez. When Tory leaves, Fatboy starts talking again.
DAMN BRO @torylanez YOU STILL NOT TRYNA GIVE ME THAT FEATURE MY N*GGA?? 😒😒😂😂 LIKE DAMN MY N*GGA SHOW LOVE!! 😤😤 GOD DONT LIKE UGLY THATS WHY HE TOOK YA HAIRLINE AWAY 😂😂😂 #FATBOYGANGI WILL GET THAT FEATURE 😤”
It’s not the first time that the pair have squared off. Tory and Fatboy previously crossed paths in the waiting room of a law firm’s lobby and it ended in the two of them comically dodging each other while neither one of them wanted to actually swing.
No Laughing Matter
In the real world things have been less than funny for Fatboy. He was arrested recently for driving without a valid license. He accused the police of coming after him because he was riding in an expensive car in a video on his Instagram. He ranted in the video:
“They just hating on a young black guy because I was driving around in a red Ferrari with no license. I understand that I was driving it with no license but listen, y’all just hating on a young black man. I ain’t doing nothing wrong but hoping in the Maybach and living my life. Damn.”
He went on to say that the police knew who he was when they brought him in.
“LISTEN LISTEN LISTEN THE MIAMI BEACH COPS WAS JUST HATING ON ME CUZ I WAS DRIVING A BRIGHT RED RARRI & THEY STATED WE KNO WHO YOU ARE BUT WE DONT GIVE A F*CK YOU GOING IN FATBOY. ITS COOL WE STILL SPREAD LOVE & BEING HAPPY LIT.”
Watch The Clip
Watch the clip up top. What do you think? Will Fatboy ever get that feature? Is Tory Lanez gonna have to look over his shoulder for the rest of his life, lest he be attacked by someone looking for a hook?
Let us know in the comments and be sure to SHARE this article.